Alex Cummings – Baltimore, Maryland

Alex Cummings is reportedly the cow that jumped over the moon before landing in Baltimore, Maryland. That also makes her the first w***e in space. In a recent poll, she got passed over for a spot on the Wheaties Box in favor of Bruce Jenner, now called Killer Katelyn for that murder due to texting/distracted driving – he was texting his BBC. This p****s Alex off, why should he/she get the spot over a w***e? Wait a minute, was this a prank for April 1st? No, it couldn’t be, Bruce/Kaitlyn is a real w***e too, and she/he’s real, but that poor driver is f*****g dead. Maybe Bruce would like the joint, for real, lot’s of N****s to cheat with, and Alex could be on the next Wheaties Box. Plus, wasn’t Bruce on the box when he was a he? That’s not fair! Sorry, Alex, life’s not fair but at least you are still alive, don’t argue with Kaitlyn about it, she might get all Bruce on you, come to Baltimore and run you over with the SUV, leave you for dead. Then stroll around in a dress and shop for a new man. You’ll be forgotten. Ain’t that Hollyweird? Some lives don’t matter.

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